Monday, 10 November 2014

Once Upon A Time, Season 4, Episode 6 "The Snow Queen"


Or better title "Family Feud"

We're princesses! Let's play with this broken kite!

Through the miracle of flashbacks, we learn that Ingrid and her two little sisters, Gerta and Helga were almost kidnapped by a kite flying predator, but Ingrid uses her icy powers to stop the abduction. A frozen tree branch falls on the creep and kills him.

Dead predator.

Gerta and Helga manage to recover quickly from witnessing their sister kill a dude with icicles and while his body lays five feet away, they promise each other to always stay true and keep Ingrid's secret. They use the ribbon from the kite to make bracelets for all three of them.

Let's decorate ourselves with evidence from the felon we killed!

No longer interested in blending in the Snow Queen roams the streets of Storybrooke in her Kardashian inspired maximum cleavage wedding gown. She goes to the clock tower and produces another magic mirror.

Regina pours over magical text books about reanimating your boyfriend's wife, but she's interrupted by Robin and his words of luv. "I don't know what to do!" he says.

Maybe stop dropping in on your ex-girlfriend?

Emma and Elsa study a book with elfish writing and they discover a spell with a candle and something else, but I'm distracted by Elsa's blue dress.

You know, the dress she's been wearing for every episode.

But Emma's magic isn't strong enough. She leaves Elsa and finds Mary Margaret and baby Neal at a sing song with other fairy tale characters and their babies (including Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty).

Keep that freaking magic away from my baby!

Emma gets a little jealous because she never had this fun stuff with her mother since she was the savior and all that. Mary Margaret gets a little freaked out when Emma makes the baby bottle start to boil. But before she can say, "This episode will be about family treating you differently when you can't control your magical powers," David comes on the walkie talkie to tell Emma the Snow Queen is in the clock tower.

Emma and Elsa arrive at the clock tower with the magic candle. This time Emma makes no mistake and is able to light the thing. A pair of firey handcuffs keep the Snow Queen from fighting back.

Oh, and Hook is there too. Why?

No really, go without me. I'm totally okay with it.

Ingrid and her sisters gets ready for a special ball for their father. But Ingrid has spent the last ten years hiding herself and her powers so she doesn't get to dance or have any good fancy times. A Duke from a neighbouring kingdom has eyes for Greta. Soon the oomp pa pa band starts up. Ingrid sneaks in to watch and begins to cry because she is such a freak and all. And every body knows, freaks don't get married to Dukes.

This is about to get Orange is the New Black.

Emma and Elsa interrogate the Snow Queen, but she refuses to give up any info about Anna. Elsa says, "We know Anna is alive. We heard her heart beat on Bo Peep's crook."

Man, if I had a nickel for every time I heard that sentence.

The Snow Queen mentions Emma's 'super power' as a human lie detector. Then they hit on the 'your family will shun you because of your magic' element for a bit to establish the plot theme for anything who hasn't caught on by now.

Henry gets all fancified in a suit and tie to work at the Pawn Shop with Gramps. Regina holds back her tears about Robin and talks about happy endings and how operation Mongoose is now her new focus.

The Snow Queen lets Emma know that she was protecting her by erasing her memories. then she says, "Elsa and I are your only family because we are the only ones alike."

Um...this is frickin' Once Upon A Time, every one has powers; Tinkerbell, Regina, Mr. Gold, Peter Pan, the Blue Fairy...

Ingrid confesses to her sisters that she is leaving and handing the throne over to Helga. Gerta pipes up and says there is someone, a sorcerror, that maybe able to help them, Rumpelstiltskin.


Belle arrives at the clock tower and can tell in one glance that the mirror is a fake.

Oh my gosh! The Snow Queen tricked them AGAIN. She wanted to get caught on purpose. Why?

Emma is in danger! When they arrive at the jail, they see the doors frozen shut.

Wil and Robin chew the fat at Granny's pub/diner/Laundromat and reminisce about the good ole days as Merry Men in the forest. Robin tries to convince himself that he's still in love with Marion.

Check it out. Our new fall line.

Ingrid and her sisters visit Rumpelstiltskin to see if he can take away her powers. He tells them their sisterly bond is very strong. He gives her a pair of gloves and a gold vase that will be her failsafe if her magic gets out of control. In return, he takes the ribbons around their wrists, which interestingly enough still fit after ten years.

The Snow Queen works the misunderstood magical person angle with Emma. "You can't love somebody you don't understand." Emma freaks and blows out a wall. The Snow Queen is excited Emma has shown her true power, plus she gets to escape jail.

Thank goodness the yellow bug was there.

When David and the others arrive to find a hole blown out the side of the Sheriff's office, Emma tells them to run away because she can't trust her powers. David gets hurt and Emma takes this as proof that she is indeed a monster. Mary Margaret feels guilty for not hugging Emma after she blew up the jail.

This is a fake mustache!

With her fancy gloves, Ingrid is now able to hang out in her royal robes. The Duke (who looks like someone's fourteen year old kid who wandered onto the set) shows up and makes a few passes. Ingrid's gloves drop and she pushes him away with her frozen powers. Helga arrives and tells him to get his creepy arse back to his kingdom. A fight ensues and Ingrid ends up zapping Helga by mistake, turning her into a pile of ice cubes.



Robin finds Regina in her tomb of candles and magic books. He doesn't say much but the meeting ends in a hot kiss.


Gerta finds Ingrid and her sister, now transparent and melting. Gerta calls her a monster and grabs the failsafe golden urn. It sucks her up lickity split. Gerta takes the gloves and travels to the Troll King and asks him for a mega potion to ensure that every one in the kingdom forgets there were three sisters.
Troll time.

The Snow Queen arrives at Mr. Gold's pawn shop and asks for her ribbons back. She knows the one last item he needs in order to cleave himself from the dagger to be able to leave Storybrooke and start to rule the world.

And she knows all of

Oh, she's owned the magic hat. Simple. And since Mr. Gold will rule the world, she's only asking to rule Storybrooke.

When he agrees, she leans over and whispers the answer to him.

Why? They're alone in the store.

Anyway, he grins so it's either a home perm kit to make him look like Rumpelstiltskin again or Hook's hook.

Check out my other Once Upon A Time recaps here!

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