Monday, 7 May 2012

Once Upon A Time, Episode 21 “An Apple Red As Blood” or “A Plot As Holey As Swiss Cheese”

She has a plan, and a recipe...
photo credit,
Emma shows up at the Mayor's front door with a posse of townspeople. Even Henry is screaming for blood. They tie her to an apple tree as she pleads for her life saying she only wanted to win for once...just like the Toronto Maple Leafs.

Emma takes a sword and does her best Shogun impersonation, slashing her in half. The Mayor bolts upright in bed, still shaking from her dream. She checks on Henry, but his lumpy form under the covers is sound asleep.

Actually, Henry is in Emma's little yellow bug happy as a clam. But once he realizes Emma is taking him away from Storybrooke that very night, he grabs the wheel and makes the car go off the road. She freaks out that he could have killed them, but he argues back that heroes don't run.

King James is upset that Prince Charming didn't marry Midas' daughter and has sentenced him to death. The Prince says he's willing to die for true love. As the blade of the guillotine drops, it turns to water. The Evil Queen struts in wearing one of her usual Halloween Hooker inspired outfits—not that there's anything wrong with that.

Seriously, this should be her theme song

The Evil Queen propositions King James to trade Prince Charming for all the wealth he can handle. King James eagerly accepts and asks why the Prince is so important to her. She grins and says he is a means of destroying Snow White.

She's a brick---house...

The Mayor discovers that her apple tree is dying. She pays Mr. Gold a visit alarming him to the fact the curse must be weakening. Mr. Gold shrugs in a super cool way, 'cause he's so cool and all. He does a quick recap of the rules, reminding us that the curse was meant to keep Snow White and Prince Charming apart and warns the Mayor that if Emma is killed, the curse will be broken.

The Mayor realizes that if she wants to keep the curse intact, Emma has to live. But this news totally bums her out because she hates Snow White and Emma equally, and can't decide who she wants to hurt more. Decisions...decisions.

It's so tough to be the only bad guy, isn't it?

The Mayor wants to strike a new deal with Mr. Gold, hoping to kill Emma and keep the curse intact, but he tells her she has nothing to barter with and watches her storm out of the shop.

If the Mayor was smart she'd drop a few hints about Belle actually being alive and hidden in Storybrooke. I'm sure that would get Mr. Gold's attention.

At school, the Mayor puts a white rabbit sticker on Paige's bike. Remember Paige? Her father is the Mad Hatter.

Emma gets an earful from Mary Margaret for trying to leave without saying good bye. She tells Emma it doesn't matter what she does or doesn't want to do—she has to do what's best for Henry. And kidnapping him and leaving the town without a Sheriff is NOT the best thing for Henry.

I love it when Mary Margaret shows some spine.

Granny, Snow White, and the dwarfs hide in the forest staking out King James' castle. Red returns from her disguised-as-a-wolf eaves dropping mission, and tells them she overheard that Prince Charming is still alive, but the Evil Queen is inside the castle as well.

The Evil Queen visits Prince Charming in the dungeon.

She's a brick----house. Mighty might, and she's lettin' all hang out...

She promises she has no intention of killing his true love. Then she holds up an apple and cackles in an I've-got-a-plan-so-evil-it-will-make-me-a-legend kind of laugh.

She's a brick----house. The lady's stacked and that's a fact, ain't holding nothing back.

Jefferson, almost as cute as Schmexy
photo credit,

The Mayor meets with Jefferson. Remember Jefferson? Yes, that's right, the Mad Hatter who disappeared after jumping out of a second story window.

I guess he's still alive. *rolls eyes*

The Mayor lays out another set of rules for us since his sudden appearance seems too convenient. Anywho, she reminds him that he'll never get Paige back if they don't work together. She brings out his magic hat and asks him to make it work.

Dear ABC,

The Blue Fairy said nothing magical can happen in Storybrooke because magic doesn't exist there.

The Mayor ignores me and tells Jefferson there's enough magic left in the hat for him to return to fairytale land.

Well, it worked for Frosty The Snowman.

She pushes harder telling him that it's the only way either of them can keep their children. She promises to “wake up” Paige so that she'll remember who she really is—his daughter. But Jefferson says he doesn't want her to remember their true life and be forced to live in Storybrooke. The only way he'll agree to help the Mayor is if she writes them a new life for this world. They make a deal.

Outside the castle Snow White listens as Red howls in the distance at the full moon, which is pretty convenient I must say.

Up in the clouds the Blue Fairy adjusts her bustier and commands her winged troop like she's re-enacting Braveheart.

Dear ABC,

Where were the fairies for all the other battles? Why is everyone rescuing Prince Charming but when the black curse rolled into town everyone took off?

Snow White, not exactly as shown
photo credit,

Snow White does a battle cry and takes out a whole court yard full of palace guards like she's Xena Warrior Princess. The dwarfs and their pick axes make a dent as well, but soon more guards show up and surround them. Wow! What are they going to do? It seems like all hope is lost.

From the dark clouds above, the buzz of killer bees grows louder. Suddenly, war hungry fairies swoop in and set off a series of fireworks that makes the castle guards fall asleep. Hooray for convenient plot twits!

Henry visits August and sees how he's slowly turning back into Pinocchio. Henry sounds surprised that the curse is real.

Um...wasn't that the whole point of finding Emma in the first place, and Operation Cobra, and everything in this series.

Dear ABC,

Please find enclosed my receipts for Tylenol migraine.

August confesses he's dying and that he's decided to give up on Operation Cobra and Emma “the non-believer.” Instead he's spending his only time left with Geppetto in his little garage/workshop. Henry feels helpless since everyone is giving up.

When the puppet stops caring, you know it's all over.

Dr. Hopper meets Emma at the pub/diner/laundromat and tells her she doesn't have enough evidence to convince the court to win custody of Henry. He strongly suggests she end her war with the Mayor for Henry's sake.

Snow White finds Prince Charming trapped in a mirror. He tells her the Evil Queen has locked him inside her castle. They talk a bit about never being together and how there seems to be a power keeping them apart...blah, blah, blah. The Evil Queen's image replaces Charming's and she asks Snow White for a meeting to discuss a truce.

The Mayor takes Jefferson to her underground vault of hearts. She tells him it's the only magical place in this world since it's full of things from fairytale land. Huh? What about Mr. Gold's shop?

Jefferson puts the hat on the floor but it remains still, unable to create a vortex to fairytale land. There's obviously not enough magic in the room. Wow! What are they going to do? It seems like all hope is lost.

Oh, wait...never mind. The Mayor pulls out a ring with Daniel's face glowing inside. She drops it in the hat, but it's still not enough to make a portal. However, Jefferson declares that it is enough to create a small opening to pull an object through.

I really hope she's thinking about Schmexy. Unfortunately, she decides to go for the apple.

Snow White finds the Evil Queen at the stables where Daniel used to work...and make out with her. They take a tour of the old homestead and stop by Daniel's grave.

Snow White is confused, she thought Daniel ran away. The Evil Queen says her mother murdered him when she found out they were in love. She blames Snow White for telling her mother their secret plan to elope, and that his murder is her fault.

Double standard! The Evil Queen cut out her own father's heart. And if I'm not mistaken, turned her creepy mother into some weird elephant thing. *sigh*

The Evil Queen holds up the poisoned apple, promising not death but a permanent coma for anyone who eats it willingly. Snow White knows Prince Charming's life is in her hands. She takes a bit to save his useless butt.

How does she know the Evil Queen just won't kill him anyway? Why doesn't she do the Xena thing again?

Back in the Mayor's underground, magical lair, the poisoned apple passes through the hat and into her hands. Before you can say Rachel Ray, she's in the kitchen whipping up pastry.

Emma arrives looking sheepish, and wants to talk about burying the hatchet. She promises to leave town in exchange for allowing visits with Henry. The oven timer goes off and Emma follows the Mayor into the kitchen. They chat more about Henry and then she offers Emma an apple turnover for the road. You know, because they're such pals and everything.

Red, the dwarfs, and Granny find Snow White in her apple coma and assume she's dead. Red declares that Snow White sacrificed herself for true love. How do they know she didn't have an aneurysm or something?

The Mayor visits Mr. Gold and brags about her poison apple plan. He looks surprised as she explains she sacrificed the last bit of magic left in Storybrooke (her ring). Mr. Gold reminds her (and us) that all magic comes at a price—usually knuts, sickles and galleons. But the Mayor only grins back and says that this time, she's won.

She's a brick----house...

Emma meets Henry at Mary Margaret's apartment and she drops the bomb about making a deal with the Mayor to leave Storybrooke. Henry freaks and tells her she can't trust the Mayor. Thank you, Voice Of Reason. Finally!

He tries to change her mind and says this is the dark moment before she realizes she has to fight back. Hey! Henry has been studying the finer points of plot structure.

Henry, AGAIN, tells Emma that she's the only one who can stop the curse. He gives her a big hug and catches a glance at the apple turnover on the counter. He tells Emma the Mayor never had any intention of making a deal, she only has plans to kill her. And since she's such a non-believer, Henry has no choice but to sacrifice himself for true love. He takes a bite, and then collapses to the floor.

Predictions for the FINAL EPISODE...

David will do or say something totally un-charming and make Mary Margaret cry.

August will cut his leg on a saw in the workshop but Geppetto will sand it down nice and smooth so it hardly shows.

Mr. Gold will have tea in the chipped cup and wish the Mayor wasn't always giving him such bad news.

Emma will sort of...kind of...finally believe and will try to awaken Henry from his coma with the magic of true love's kiss, because he's the thing she loves the most. The camera will pan in close to his face, he'll open his eyes and then the credits will roll...just like Avatar

What do you think will happen? Will we ever see Schmexy again? And where the heck is Sleeping Beauty in all this?



Lydia Kang said...

"Please find enclosed my receipts for Tylenol migraine."

OMG, this was too funny!

BR Myers said...

Thanks, Lydia. Tylenol should be the sponser.

Claude Dancourt said...

Great recap. "When the puppet stops caring..." good one.

It seems a lot of people are upset with this episode...

I personally think it had too much "Harry Potter" in it. Come on : the ring Daniel gave Regina (and she still wears, btw) has the strongest magic??? Someone actually listened when Dumbledore explains Love is the strongest magic of all... And Henry eating the pie with SO obvious. Anyway. The only thing I really wonder about is why Gold/Rumple wants the curse broken.

Six days until we know. I guess.

BR Myers said...

Thanks, Claude.

Don't expect any answers next week. Gold is supposed to be waiting for his son, right? And what if Emma didn't take the apple turnover? Regina wasted the whole apple on one recipe! Why not apple slices and peanut butter? Or maybe apple juice???

Ouch. Pass the Tylenol.

Kimberlee Turley said...

Man, have not had the time to watch this, but loving the commentary just as much!

BR Myers said...

Thanks, Kimberlee!

Anonymous said...

"They tie her to an apple tree as she pleads for her life saying she only wanted to win for once...just like the Toronto Maple Leafs."

Oh, my sweet Oprah but that's funny. One of my protags is a long-suffering Astros fan and my main protag is a Canadiens fan. Might have to change that for the loyalty/Saint Jude/lost cause factor. Good stuff, BR.

BR Myers said...

Long and suffering perfectly describes a Leafs fan.

Thanks, Elias! I love your comments.

lexcade said...

This is the best one yet. I love your predictions for next episode. I still miss Schmexy.

And where IS Sleeping Beauty??? And Cinderella for that matter. And will someone PLEASE update me on Belle? That episode STILL kills me :(

I don't know what I'll do without OUAT and your commentary...

BR Myers said...

Thanks, lady. I'm not sure what I'll do either. I'm thinking about blogging GRIM but I'm not sure. I haven't watched any yet. Or maybe TVD...

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