Monday 3 September 2012

How To Find Love In The Bookstore

 

The self help section, obviously.
photo credit, weheartit.com
Listen up, potential Romeos! 

Some men think the club/dance bar is the best place to find the next potential lover. However, since I haunt the aisles of my local bookstore and the library on a regular basis, I've noticed a lot of flirting going on.

If you're in the mood for love between the covers—see what I did there? Between the covers. It could mean bed sheets or the pages of a book.

*Clears throat* Ahem, sorry.

Anywho, here are the top ten ways to help any guy find love in the bookstore.

1. "I think you dropped this copy of Pride and Prejudice. I know it's not mine, I own the first print edition.

2. "Excuse me, do you know where I can find, Decorating Your Mansion For Dummies?"

3. Don't say anything. Walk around with Fifty Shades of Grey tucked under your arm while making eye contact and biting your lip.

4. "That's quite an impressive stack you've got. Can I help carry your books?"

5. "I wish they sold these bookcases. My library at home already takes up two rooms."

6. "Can you recommend a good read for a newly divorced millionaire?"

7. "Let's get a coffee and talk about how Katniss is way more awesome than Bella."

8. "You're a writer? Just for fun, let's list who you'd want to cast in the movie version."

9. "You know, I feel sad for kids who watch the Harry Potter movies without reading the books."

10. "I'll buy you any book you want, which I promise to also read. Then I'll treat you to a Trenta sized Caramel Macchiato while we discuss the character development in detail."

Which one would work on you?

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13 comments:

Jane Lebak said...

Did you see on Twitter a while ago, a woman tweeted that a guy started to hit on her while she was standing in front of her book in B&N? And he gave her some pickup line about showing her good books rather than this trash. She picked up her own book and said, "Like this one?" The guy derided it, and she said, "I wrote it."

She followed up with something about not minding that he wanted to pick up women in the bookstore, but not to trash other people's book choices. Which is always good advice. ;-)

The line that would have worked on me is #10, actually. I'm always up for an informal book club kind of thing.

BR Myers said...

I never read that...crazy! Geez, what are the odds he picks out an actual author.

And what the heck was she doing walking around with her own book?

Although, I'd probably do the same thing, except I'd drop it off in the 'new and hot' section at the front of the store ;)

Arianna said...

Being the bitter old lady soul I am, I would brush off all of these and completely blow the guy off. Not that these would happen anyway. I'd just watch the guy pull these out on the pretty girl standing next to me.

But in a fantasy world where I might actually have a chance with a guy, I'd have to say #4 would be my favorite. It just seems sweet and gentlemen-y. Then if he followed it up with #7 I'd be sold.

And if my book ever got published (which I highly doubt at this point) I'd buy a ton of copies of it because no one else would.

Unknown said...

All of these made me smile. But for me, definitely #4 and #10, except I'd pass on the Macchiato and ask him if he wanted to get ice cream. :)

Jane Lebak said...

Bethany, she was looking at her book in the YA section, not carrying it around.

I had friends who did reposition my first book in the bookstore. I'm sure they're not supposed to do that, but they'd rearrange the section so it was front-facing and stuff like that. I did the same for others of my friends, sliding books around so theirs was front-facing on the shelf. :-)

No one ever put mine on the "new and hot" tables that I know of. LOL!

BR Myers said...

Arianna,

Stop building those walls. I know you're a hopeless romantic. Hurry up and go fall in love, already!

Jadzia,

Ice cream always wins!


Jane,

I got you back, bro. I will put you in the 'new and hot' section ;)

Jane Lebak said...

Same here! I'll rearrange the whole book store so the Ms in the YA section are at eye-level. ;-)

Employee: "Ma'am, what are you doing?"
Me: "Drag that shelf over here, will you? I'm going to put A through C over there because otherwise this book is at knee-height and no one's going to see it."

Jessica Salyer said...

lol. This is too funny. A few of them would work. ;)

Laila N Mysis said...

#7-10 may work on me... in my head. In reality, if a guy waltzed up to me and said those things, I'd be suspicious/worried/going through all my self-defense lessons. But besides those, and #1, I think I'm missing the point on all the rest... maybe I'm reading to into them? o.O

Awesome post though, and honestly, it's a guilty pleasure kind of dream of mine to find love in a bookstore... or library. If only ^^

(And and and, thank you for the Clearing Up of Query Confusion for me in the last post. I said I wouldn't keep irritating you, so I'm thanking you here. It really helped.)

Arianna said...

This is seriously my favorite blog post. I think everyone should read it. I might steal this and feature it on my blog. Is that okay? I'll totally credit you. I just love it so much.

BR Myers said...

Laila,

Thank you for the blog love!

Arianna,

YES! I'd be honored to be on you blog.

Jackie said...

I love your blog posts. So creative and funny!!!
7 and 9 ... so true!

BR Myers said...

Gah! thanks, Jackie!

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