Thursday, 10 October 2013

Is This About The Underwear?

A comfortable pair of underwear is a cherished item, my friends. It can be the difference between having a great day or a lousy one filled with exploding pens, broken heels, paper cuts and sideways rain that renders your umbrella useless as you run for the bus.

I think you know where I'm going with this, I LOVE comfy underthings.
lululemon, Halifax, NS

Imagine my excitement when my favorite brand of lululemon unmentionables went on sale!!!

The yoga gear clad girl at the cash asked if I wanted a bag for my purchase. I laughed. It would be like the using a full sized grocery bag for one egg.

I said, no thanks, then gathered my backpack and continued on my way to work. A few hours later, I dug out my lunch and I realized my new pair of underwear weren't in my backpack.

Ugh. I had forgotten them on the counter.

I phoned the store, hating how I'd have to explain how stupid I was. But the voice that answered wasn't a pert melodic female. It was a dude. And he sounded hot.

Double ugh.

I'm way too old to be blushing over the phone because of a boy, but when I had to ask him to look for my forgotten underwear, my ears were on fiyah

He was polite and asked for my name. Then he said I could pick them up anytime. After my ears cooled down, I wondered if he was hoping I was some long legged beauty of toned calves and taught abs. I considered sending my niece in my place. She's built like Jessica Rabbit. And if they hit if off, it would be a great story to tell their kids.

Instead, I waited for the next day. It was only underwear, I reasoned, and the dude probably forgot all about it. I strolled up to the cash, relieved to see three smiling girls all in a row. I dropped my voice and asked for my package.

The girl's eyes grew wide. She had no idea what I was talking about. "A forgotten purchase?" she was stunned. Apparently, no one has ever done that in her whole young life.

And that's when I heard his voice, "Is this about the underwear?"

I turned and we faced each other. I took in his stylish, two day stubble. He took in my grey roots. I knew in that fraction of a second as I watched his smile fade, I should have sent in my niece.

                                                  The chiseled and disappointed clerk (not exactly as shown, but pretty close).

Life is full of disappointments and chances not taken, I guess. It was a cruel lesson for him that day.

His fantasy was crushed, but at least I had my favorite underwear...and a title for this post.


Stacy McKitrick said...

Thanks for the laugh! Isn't it nice to know you have a sexy voice over the phone, though?

Robin said...

LOL! Seriously such a great post. I'm so glad you talked about your unmentionables. I'm going to be giggling about this one all day:D

Alice Kaltman said...

Robin tweeted about this. And I'm glad she did! So funny and on target for those of us 'of a certain age' Glad you got your underdrawers...oh I mean underwear!

Leandra Wallace said...

Too funny! But the undies were saved, so it was definitely a happy ever after. ;)

Laila N Mysis said...

AHAHAHAHAHA. Nice story :) I think it still makes for a good one to tell YOUR kids. But I'm amazed that his 'hot' voice actually coincided with the expectation of his appearance. I donno, I figure that this stuff only happens in books, and in the 'real world', hot voiced people are not THAT attractive, and attractive people might not necessarily have hot voices. Huh.

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