Monday, 14 October 2013

Once Upon A Time Season 3, Episode 3, "Quite A Common Fairy"

Or better title "It Sucks to be Mulan"

Emma and the gang follow her magical orphan map, but Peter Pan's camp keeps moving, making them roam around in circles.

Back at Rumpelstiltskin castle, Neil searches the magic cupboard to find something to make a portal so he can get to Neverland. Robin Hood puts a wet blanket on the situation by saying it's a crazy pants idea. Mulan rolls her eyes at the guys, wishing she was fighting a dragon somewhere. The Merry Men come into the room. Robin's son, Rolland, rushes into his father's arms. Neil lights up with an idea.
Robin Hood, much better looking than the last guy.

Captain Sexy Eyes (CSE) mentions Tinkerbell can help them find the camp, plus she has pixie dust, which everyone knows is way more powerful than regular fairy dust. David is encouraged by this because his wound from the previous night's sword fight is getting worse. CSE tells him it's poisoned and he'll probably be dead soon. Regina warns them Tinkerbell is no ordinary fairy.

A newly wed, Queen Regina quarrels with Rumpelstiltskin—she's sick of her dark magic lessons and hates her life with the King and his insipid daughter, little Snow White. She's still bitter about the stable boy being killed by her mother, which she totally blames on Snow White.

*cough* plot hole *cough*


She's desperate to escape her life, and ends up half jumping/half falling off her balcony. But before she hits the stones below, Tinkerbell flies out from nowhere and saves her. The next logical step is for the two of them to bond over a couple of pints in an outdoor tavern. Tinkerbell feels sorry for Regina and her loveless marriage. She offers up the power of pixie dust to help her fall in love again.

While CSE leads the others to Tinkerbell's lair, Regina tries to convince Emma that they can combine their magic to defeat Peter Pan. Emma doesn't take her up on it because all magic comes at a price.

Why didn't they try that the very first night. Or when they were fighting the Lost Boys. Or when... oh never mind.

Peter Pan shows Henry a poisoned bow and arrow and orders him to shoot an apple off the head of one of the Lost Boys. Henry is shaking in his boots. Instead, he aims at Peter Pan who manages to catch the arrow in mid-air because he's so badass and dark and powerful.

I can't help but notice that Henry has grown a lot over the summer. He's supposed to be ten but he's getting closer to like fourteen.


Tinkerbell travels to the land of giant tulips. The Blue Fairy reprimands her for trying to help Regina, who everyone knows has been taking lessons with The Dark One. She refuses Tinkerbell any pixie dust and forbids her from helping Regina—but Tinkerbell steals some anyway.
Neil tries to convince Robin Hood that his son, Rolland can summon the Dark Shadow that steals little boys from their bedroom windows. That way Neil can grab on for a free ride to Neverland. Robin Hood will not budge until Neil reminds him Rumpelstiltskin once saved his wife's life, and he relents.
That's the magic of the logic of Once Upon A Time.

Regina stays behind, not wanting to see Tinkerbell. The others go on without her, but this proves not to be a great idea, when Tinkerbell comes out from behind a huge paper mache rock and blows unconscious dust in her face.

Tinkerbell visits Queen Regina and they take a ride with the stolen pixie dust.


The dust makes a trail to a village where apparently Regina's happiness is waiting for her. They peek through the tavern window and zero in on the luminescent dude with a lion tattoo on his forearm. That's the guy who will make her happy. That's the guy she is destined to be with. Regina opens the door...then runs away.

Oh man! The commercial for the Toy Story Halloween special looks AWESOME.

Sorry, I digress.

CSE and the others find Tinkerbell's tree house is empty. They channel Scooby Doo and quickly figure out Tinkerbell has been tracking them and has probably captured Regina.

Regina realizes Tinkerbell doesn't have magic and is therefore not a threat. But Tinkerbell grabs a deadly thorn from the deadly thorn bush that's maybe called shadow baneI'm not sure and I was too lazy to rewind. Anyway, Regina doesn't even flinch. She rips out her own heart and thrusts it in Tinkerbell's hand, calling her bluff.

Say what you will, but that move took balls.

Queen Regina lies to Tinkerbell and says the man with the lion tattoo was not her true love, in fact he was horrible. But Tinkerbell sees through her act. Regina then confesses she was in love before, but doesn't want to be hurt again. Tinkerbell is upset because she stole for Regina!

What the heck will she do now?!

The Blue Fairy catches up to Tinkerbell and gets all Mother Superior in her face for betraying her trust; she no longer believes in her. Tinkerbell loses her wings and falls to the ground.

While Tinkerbell clutches her heart, Regina said she left without seeing her true love because she was afraid to be happy. She thought without her anger she'd be weak. So she chose revenge over hope, and it made her heart black.

Tinkerbell gives Regina her heart back, but says it's took late to save Henry because he's been with Peter Pan for too long.

Peter Pan tells Henry that Neverland runs on magic. People have stopped believing around the world and considering he's the truest believer, it's his job to make the world believe again. He is the only one who can save Neverland. Henry isn't convinced.

Hmm...wouldn't that make him a non-believer?

While Rolland is situated to go up as bait Neil gives everyone a lesson about making sure you tell the one you love how you truly feel. Mulan nods knowingly because she's hot for Prince Phillip, Aurora's fella.

Rolland stands up against the bedroom window and says, “I believe.” The window bangs open, and the shadow flies in. Mulan does some sword work to make sure Rolland isn't dragged off. Neil grabs hold and he's off to Neverland.


Seeing how fantastic she is with a sword, Robin Hood offers Mulan a place among his Merry Men, but she declines his offer and rushes off to see Phillip, ready to lay her heart at his feet. She arrives to see Aurora glowing with news that she and Phillip are preggers. Mulan is visible crushed. She tells Aurora she's joining Robin Hood after all.

Good to have a back up plan.

The others find Regina and Tinkerbell, they offer her a ride back to the Enchanted forest if she helps them find Peter Pan's camp. She breaks it to them she has no pixie dust, but she can still convince Peter Pan to let her into his hideaway.

David tries to put on a brave face while he imagines the clock ticking down. No fairy dust, no cure.

Too bad no one believes in her because that's where all her magic comes from. I bet that's not going to come up again.

Neil gets dropped by the Dark Shadow and is immediately met by one of the Lost Boys.

Tinkerbell asks Regina about the man with the lion tattoo and tells her it was selfish she didn't go in to meet him because she ended up ruining his life as well.

 Mulan enters the camp and shakes Robin Hood's hand accepting his offer, and what do you know....lion tattoo.

So this means Mulan will probably fall in love with this dude, only to lose him to Regina when they all eventually end up meeting in a vortex. Like I said, it sucks to be Mulan.

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