Emma, Hook and Snow White are in the graveyard trying to outrun a sudden tornado. Hook leads them to a monument that can only shelter than on one side.
Anyway, something comes out of the storm and attacks Snow White.
Boom!
Never mind, Emma was only dreaming.
Not wanting to fall asleep again, she and Hook visit the library where Regina has been busy marking up the elevator door to Hades' lair with ancient runes all over a door so Emma could magically spell it open. Sounds like a plan until they discover a wall of brick behind the door.
Man, too bad their magic is only good for elevator doors and healing horses.
Flashback to the enchanted forest and we learn Belle's father has arranged for a hot young Prince to marry Belle so they can merge their kingdoms against the ogres who are apparently waging a war...all the time.
Belle's like, "I don't think so. I want a dude who will treat me with kindness and respect not some hot shot lady killer who likes to decorate with antlers."
But this is irrelevant because when the handsome Gaston arrives, she's all, "Cool. Let's take a walk in the woods."
The hike soon turns into a date with Gaston being all smooth and complimentary. Belle talks about books and then they discover a baby ogre has fallen down a hole!!
Even though ogres are murders and pose a direct threat to Belle and her kingdom she decides it would be a good idea to find out what his intensions are before letting Gaston kill him.
Back in hell town, Belle finds Mr. Gold and they have the same argument again.
Belle: "You need to change. I know you're a good man. I won't stay with you or let you be this baby's father until you change."
Mr. Gold: "I'm the beast. I'll always be the beast. You love the beast. I won't change."
Belle: "Well...fix this agreement with Hades first, but don't use dark magic...then we'll talk again."
They take a walk down Main Street where Gaston tries to shot Mr. Gold with an enchanted arrow from Hades.
Pfft! Mr. Gold catches the arrow like the awesome piece of superiority.
Belle says, "Gaston, how did you die?"
"The Dark One turned me into a rose."
Then Mr. Gold whisks himself and Belle away to the docks. He explains the water in the harbor is full of ghosts or something and one touch and you'll be stuck in hell forever...I think. Belle is inspired and decides they must help Gaston move on and then defeat Hades together and get the hell out of hell.
Across town, Regina and Zelena settle in for some sister to sister chat. Zelena reveals her history with Hades and that he still wants to take her to prom. But she's all, "Ugh, what does it matter? No one will ever really love me."
This show y'all! God forbid any woman in Storybrooke have any self respect when it comes to romance.
Thinking this will help him move on, Belle and Mr. Gold break into Gaston's locker at the pet shelter.
Why are there pets in hell?
But Belle finds one of her favourite books and she concludes that Gaston is still in love with her. Mr. Gold rolls his eyes and leaves.
Hades then appears and reminds Belle that he owns her baby. But he offers her a deal: get Mr. Gold and Gaston to duel at the docks and if one of them is tossed over she gets to keep her baby.
Belle refuses.
Why?
Because she has a better plan to dupe Gaston. Not really, she tried to fool him with a dummy Mr. Gold, and oh my gosh, folks, so bad...so bad. When Gaston learns Belle is actually married to the guy who turned him into a rose he's all, "You sick chick!"
We flashback to the baby ogre stuck in the hole. Belle brings a mirror that has the power to show true intensions to help her see into the baby ogres soul or something. Gaston is upset and fires an arrow, but not before Belle sees Gaston's eyes glow red in the mirror's reflection. She lets the baby ogre get away, which Gaston had tortured a bit in her absence.
Note: I'm sure the ogre that broke into their castle and killed her mother was in no way related to this event.
Belle finds Mr. Gold and tells him Gaston is really upset now that he knows they're married. Literally two seconds later, Mr. Gold is doing the hovering choke hold to Gaston over the harbor. Belle stops Mr. Gold, but then she and Gaston fight and she manages to push him off the dock.
Oops.
Hades shows up and lets them know that doesn't count because it was supposed to be Gaston and Mr. Gold dueling NOT Belle.
Hades sees a wilted daisy and is quite happy because now he has a gift to show Zelena his affections.
Plus, Emma's dream came true, but when Snow White was attacked the wolf turned out to be RUBY!!!
Yeah! Finally, someone who can stir up these losers.
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