Monday 30 April 2012

Once Upon A Time, Episode 20, "The Stranger" or "August Reveals His Wood-y Nature"

August puts a medieval looking lock on Mary Margaret's door just in case the Mayor decides to plant fake murder evidence in her apartment again. He smiles at Emma and tells her he took wood shop in grade eight. Really? I made a spice rack. Emma announces that she's going to fight the Mayor for custody of Henry with help from Mr. Gold.


photo credit, insidepulse.com


Before Mary Margaret can convince her that Mr. Gold is the last person to be giving legal advice, Emma gets a walkie talkie call about 'Operation Cobra.' Emma rushes over to the pub/diner/laundromat to meet with him. I can't help but notice how all the shop windows on Storybrooke's Main street are boarded up.

Well, of course they are! Granny has a monopoly on the town business.

August follows along like a puppy asking Emma to go on a field trip with him, promising to show her what she's looking for. He tells her the only way to beat the Mayor is by seeing the 'big picture'.

Emma declines and finds Henry all by himself in a booth, studying the storybook. He shows Emma that someone added a new story near the end. A new story about *drum roll* Pinocchio!

*cough* I knew it *cough*

Beach combing in fairytale land
photo credit, durancemagazine.com
A raft manned by Gepetto and a living wooden Pinocchio is being tossed in an angry sea. Gepetto wakes up on a beach in Vancouver (Yay! Canada). He stumbles across the sand and finds Pinocchio face down in the water. He hugs the lifeless puppet wishing he could have saved him.

The Blue fairy shows up, and for once she actually grants someones wish! Now, no longer made of wood, Pinocchio is finally a REAL BOY! The fairy tells him to be brave, truthful, and unselfish. That way he'll always be a real boy. What about being sloppy, scratching yourself, and the inability to sit still?



August calls Mr. Gold and says they need to discuss Emma and their plan to make her a believer. Before he can make it out the apartment, August is seized by a painful cramp and pulls off his pants to reveal a woody *clears throat* I mean leg. He has a wooden leg. 

Mary Margaret returns to her job at the school and the Mayor is there. Cat fight! Mary Margaret makes it clear she knows what the Mayor did but ends up forgiving her. She says she feels sorry for her because she has a giant hole in her heart. And that it must be truly miserable to only feel happiness by destroying others.

Whoa! Snap!

Henry comes along and adds his two cents by calling her the Evil Queen, and that the curse will soon be broken. Yeah, sometimes is sucks being the villain.

August goes to Mr. Gold's shop and sees Gepetto. He takes a cuckoo clock from the counter promising to fix it. August is visibly stressed but says nothing to Gepetto. Mr. Gold arches his eyebrow and asks him what he's so afraid of telling his own father.

Hmm. I would think Mr. Gold would have a soft spot for the estranged son/father thing. Well, I guess that episode was a whole seven days ago. *rolls eyes*

Mr. Gold promises to steer Emma toward August so he can show her the 'big picture' and if that doesn't work, he'll show her his woody leg. His wooden leg

Gepetto and Pinocchio work on the cuckoo clock in fairytale land. But Jiminy Cricket has been tied up inside as a joke by Pinocchio. What a mischievous boy! I wonder how that attribute will affect the rest of the story?

The Blue Fairy arrives and warns them about the Evil Queen's curse and how Snow White's baby will save them all. She asks Gepetto to build a magic wardrobe as a gateway to a new world for Snow White and Prince Charming. *cough* knew it *cough* click here *cough*

Mr. Gold advises Emma she's facing years of emotionally draining and expensive court battles if she wants custody of Henry. Emma is upset by his change in plans and automatically goes to August. Yeah, because that's logical. Emma asks him to help her see the 'big picture'. *insert wooden leg joke here*

The Mayor's car breaks down just as David is coming around the corner. I guess the animal shelter is close by. He gives her a lift home and she invites in for lasagna. I'm sorry but isn't this the woman who framed his true love? He's so stupid!!! He's so, so...clueless.

The Mayor gives him a sob story about Henry not wanting to spend time at home anymore. David feels sorry for her because he really is clueless. And since he's so charming clueless he stays for lasagna.

The Blue Fairy shows Pinocchio and Gepetto the very last magic tree in fairytale land. Wow! I wonder if it was planted with the very last magic bean. What is it with the very-last-magic everything in this series?

The tree has enough magic to let two go through. Gepetto realizes that Pinocchio will turn back into a wooden puppet when the curse arrives. He agrees to build the wardrobe if Pinocchio can take one of the spots, thereby staying human.

Jiminy tries to convince him otherwise but Gepetto shuts him down. He reminds Jiminy owes him since he was responsible for the death of his parents (remember the creepy dolls in Mr. Gold's shop?) No? Click here for that recap.

The Blue Fairy agrees to his request and tells Snow White and Prince Clueless that only one of them can go through the magic door. It's obvious a pregnant Snow White will have to go through.

August takes Emma on his motorcycle and they leave Storybrooke.

The Mayor and Clueless David talk about the day she found him unconscious on the side of the road. If she hadn't found him, she says wide eyed, he would have died fifteen minutes later.

Really? Like fifteen minutes, exactly? Not sixteen minutes or say, fourteen minutes and thirty-two seconds?

David says it's almost like the Universe wanted her to find him. The Mayor takes advantage of his clueless nature and leans in for a kiss like he's the Sheriff.

Aw, *sniff* I miss Schmexy.

AWKWARD!
photo credit, beyondhollywood.com
David does the jazz square back-step so quick even I feel sorry for her. They do the embarrassing post-almost-kiss thing where they look at each others shoes and mumble stuff. He takes off speedy quick and she smashes her wine glass against the wall.

Listen, I know it hurts to be rejected, but you never, NEVER waste wine.






The Blue Fairy interrupts Gepetto as he's putting the finishing details on the magic wardrobe. She frantically tells him Snow White's baby is about to be born! This means Snow White will have to take Pinocchio's ticket.

The Blue Fairy tells Gepetto he must relay this to Snow White. She'd do it but unfortunately she has to bunker down with the other fairies or some other lame excuse.

Gepetto decides to stick with his original plan. He tells Pinocchio that sometimes it's okay to lie to protect the one you love. It's also okay to lie to a friend when she asks you if her jeans make her look fat.

Pinocchio is now responsible to guard the baby and that in twenty-eight years—hold on.

Dear ABC,

Why twenty-eight years? Is it because no one wanted to watch a show where the heroine is over thirty?

So little Pinocchio not only has to raise an infant in a non-magical world, but he also has to make sure she believes in fairytale land and saves them all. He takes the challenge. Hooray! Jiminy gives him a pep talk about temptation in the new world, which is probably a bit over the head of a little kid.

Gepetto sends Pinocchio through the door and cries.

August takes Emma to the roadside diner where she was found as a baby. She's furious that he tricked her. That plus the fact she now has helmet head, instead of her huge awesome usual hairdo. He pulls out an old newspaper article and tells her he was the little boy who found her that day.

There's nothing finer than a roadside diner!
photo credit, imbd.com

A hole blasts out of a tree and Pinocchio stumbles into the real world. He cowers as an airplane flies overhead. He blacks out and his life flashes before his eyes. When he wakes up, he brushes off his lederhosen, ready for his new life as protector of 'the savior'.

A baby cries and he finds little Emma inside the tree. He cradles her in his arms and looks around the forest totally scared...just like any new mother.

August takes Emma back into the woods behind the diner, and shows her the tree they came through. He tells her he's Pinocchio and that he added pages to Henry's book. She asks him how it ends and he tells her the only way it can end is if she believes.

Emma looks like she's going to throw up. She walks away but turns back when August trips and clutches his shin. He pulls on his jeans to show her proof. Emma looks at his exposed woody—sorry—but she only sees a real leg, not the mahogany grain we know is really there.

Oh, right, she's a non-believer. August pleads that she is the key to defeating the curse. Lives depend on her finally believing. Emma freaks out that she has to save everyone and says he's crazy. He tells her she's their only hope.

Doesn't this sound familiar? I believe she and the Mad Hatter had the same conversation. Anyway, at least she's consistent. Emma walks away with her flattened, limp hair barely making a swish.

Pinocchio leans over a crib to console a crying baby Emma. The orphanage is complete with grey walls and a mean handy man. One of the other orphans takes Pinocchio aside and shows him a wad of cash he stole. A bunch of kids are making a break for it and plan on catching the next bus out of 'Bleak House.' But here's the catch, baby Emma will have to stay behind.

After two seconds Pinocchio leaves little Emma for the open road. Huh?

Dear ABC,

Huh?

August goes to Gepetto's workshop/garage. The conversation naturally involves sons and fathers and broken promises—oh yeah, and guilt. This, of course, is how most strangers greet each other. Then Gepetto adds a little pearl about trying to fix a mistake after you've messed up makes everything better...or something like that. Funny, no one mentions true love's kiss.

August offers to help Gepetto at the workshop/garage and the camera pans back in what looks like a beer commercial or at least a Father's Day Hallmark advertisement.

Emma calls Henry on the walkie talkie. She's waiting outside his house in her little yellow bug. They have a heart to heart and she asks if he's ready to live with her. He says, heck yeah! And then they drive off into the night!

Kidnapper!!

What horrible thing will the Mayor do next?

And if Pinocchio and Emma made it though to the real world but returned to Storybrooke, what the heck is taking Bellfire so long to show up?

Cheers!

4 comments:

lexcade said...

Alt title: August finally shows Emma his wood. ;)

Kimberlee Turley said...

Lexade, if this was the QT forum, I'd give you karma for that last comment.

BR Myers said...

*snort.giggle. snort*

lexcade said...

Hahahaha thanks, Kimberlee. I'll take your phantom Karma.

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