Monday, 19 March 2012

Once Upon A Time, Episode 16, Heart of Darkness or Isn't That Convenient

Red and Prince Charming are huddled around a fire in the snow. Suddenly, King George's guards charge from the woods. Red tells Prince Charming to take off with the horse. He pleads for her to go with him, but she turns away and tells him to get a head start.

If only there was a convenient way to escape.
Cue the full moon. Isn't that convenient?!

The red cloak comes off and it's wolf time.

Emma takes mug shots of Mary Margaret while telling her she had no choice but to arrest her.

Yesterday it was David, now its Mary Margaret. Make up your mind, woman!

Emma explains the Mayor will say it's favortism, and then she'll get fired. Oh dear, Emma, yes that would be the worst thing that could happen from all of this—unemployment.

Snow White coaxes a songbird into the dwarf's cottage then proceeds to chase it with a broom, trying to smack it flat. Grumpy arrives and almost gets the broom as well.

She's being grumpy to Grumpy.

He tells her to put down the weapon, sorry I mean broom, and join the others for supper. But it's not supper, it's an intervention, complete with Jiminy Cricket. All the dwarfs take turns telling her the potion that made her forget Prince Charming has changed her from a lovable yet sad girl, into a crazy cleaning woman with permanent PMS.

She rants about her life of luxury at the palace, her father being murdered, and then having to escape being killed by that sexy Huntsman (okay the sexy part was my idea). She decides she's entitled to a little revenge and plans to kill the Evil Queen. Jiminy Cricket tries to reason with her, but she grabs a pick axe and stomps out of there like the creepy killer dude from My Bloody Valentine.

Emma is giving Mary Margaret a lie detector test. Of course the Mayor is there. *rolls eyes*

Emma puts the wooden box down and asks Mary Margaret if it looks familiar. Mary Margaret says it's her jewelry box. Emma is shocked—that's the box the heart was found in!!!

The Mayor pipes up and says, “a woman with a broken heart can do unspeakable things.”

Like dress and decorate your home in only three colors? Personally I thought it was in bad taste to use the word 'heart' know considering the evidence.

Snow White unsaddles one of the Evil Queen's guards and threatens him with the pick axe, demanding the whereabouts of the Evil Queen. He informs her she's taking a trip to the summer palace. Snow White knocks him unconscious and steals his armor. Grumpy shows up and pleads with her to go back to Rumpelstiltskin to fix her black heart. Snow White agrees only because he may be able help her with the assassination.

Emma inspects the front door and the windows at Mary Margaret's apartment, hoping for evidence that someone broke in and stole the jewelry box. Henry arrives and tries to help Emma since there's no need for school with his teacher in jail and everything.

Yup, that makes perfect sense to me.

Suddenly—because there's never any foreshadowing in this series—they hear a noise from under the vent. Emma takes off the iron cover and finds a hunting knife wrapped in bloody cloth.

Cool! A singing knife. I don't remember that in any fairytales.

The writer, I mean August, finds Henry at the diner/pub/laundromat. He's a bit bummed out by the discovery of the murder weapon in his teacher's bedroom.

Ew. I foresee an appointment with Dr. Hopper.

August is hopeful and encourages Henry to find answers in his storybook. Henry senses a new member for Operation Cobra. August confides that he believes the stories are true. He tells Henry he has faith and wants others to see the light too.

August is beginning to sound a little too messiah like. *squirms uncomfortably*

August reminds Henry that Emma is someone who requires proof—and lots of conditioner.

Shampoo commercial, take two.
photo credit,

Have you seen how big her hair is getting? Forget being the daughter of Snow White, I think Emma is Rapunzel.

Prince Charming follows tracks in the snow and finds the naked guard who tells him Snow White was the crazy chick who robbed him.

David interrupts the Mayor's apple snack time and tries to convince her that Mary Margaret is good not evil. The Mayor tells him evil isn't born, its made—just like boy bands!

photo credit,

Emma stares at Mary Margaret through the bars and tells her about the singing knife that was hidden under her floor. She's worried because the evidence is piling up.

So is something else, and it's really stinky. *plugs nose*

Mr. Gold arrives and offers his service of legal counsel to defend Mary Margaret in court. Although she can't pay him, Mr. Gold takes her case saying he's invested in her future.

Rumpelstiltskin tells Grumpy the potion took away a big piece of Snow White's heart since she lurved Prince Charming sooo much. He looks at a shelf full of glass bottles, but one space is empty. Mr. Gold says love is the most powerful magic of all, and if you can bottle that power, you can rule the world.

I believe someone said that about Baileys when it was first invented.

Snow White could care less about love. She tells Rumpelstiltskin her plans to kill the Evil Queen. He skips with glee and gives her an arrow, plus a map showing the best vantage point from where to shoot. In return, Rumpelstiltskin takes no payment, saying that he's invested in her future.

Weird deja vu moment.

David goes to Dr. Hopper's office and asks for help with his blackouts.

Can you say hypnosis?

Prince Charming barges into Rumpelstiltskin's castle and demands some answers. When Rumpelstiltskin says there's nothing her can do, Prince Charming proclaims all curses can be broken by true love's kiss.

Except all those other times it didn't work.

Rumpelstiltskin makes David trade his cloak for information on Snow White. He gives him the map and says the arrow will make her just as evil as the person it kills.

What if she kills someone really nice? Would that work too?

Prince Charming finds Snow White and lays a big one, right on the smacker. Then she knocks him out.


Henry shows Emma the ring of weird looking keys he found hidden in the Mayor's office. He says that's proof she got into the apartment and planted the singing knife. Emma is unconvinced, but hey, what do you know, the last one he tries fits.

Isn't that convenient?!

Whoa, Emma is shocked. She's not used to weird stuff happening.

Prince Charming wakes up tied to a tree. Snow White demands his name. He tries to convince her they're in love. She tells him obviously not, since his kiss did nothing. He is helpless to stop her from carrying out her plans to kill the Queen. She says 'just watch me' and walks away.

How can he watch her if she walks away?

David is in a trance, lying on the couch in Dr. Hopper's office. While under, David says he spoke to Katherine the night she left and they had made amends. He starts to have flashbacks of Mary Margaret as Snow White on her way to kill the Evil Queen. When David wakes up, he runs out of the office keeping his secret.

Finally, he does something smart.

Jiminy Cricket unties Prince Charming. He suggests in order to help Snow White, he has to help her remember who she used to be.

The Evil Queen and her entourage travel down the road on horseback as Snow White tracks them from above. She readies the 'arrow of revenge' and lets it fly, but Prince Charming lunges in the way. With an arrow stuck in his shoulder, he tells her he would rather die than let her live with a heart of darkness.

Snow White's expression softens, and she kisses him. And that did the trick. They make out as he continues to bleed from the arrow sticking out of his body.

Suddenly—because these guys are all about the surprise attack—King George's guards drag Prince Charming away. Snow White promises to find him...she will always find him.

Hey, that's his line.

David visits Mary Margaret in jail and tells her about his flashback. She's dumbstruck that he would even think she was guilty of killing Katherine. When the evidence pointed to him, she never doubted his innocence and stood by ready to defend him against the town.

Too bad she didn't hit him this time too.

She tells him to leave. Poor Mary Margaret. Seriously, when Mr. Gold is the only one interested in helping you, things aren't good.

Only one thing can fix this mess. Release the UNICORN! There that ought to shake things up.

Mary Margaret returns to the dwarf's cottage to apologize. Grumpy and the others can see she has changed and they tackle her in a group hug. Snow White tells them Prince Charming is in trouble. Apparently this was exactly what they wanted to hear. The dwarfs get all pick axe crazy, ready to take on the castle.

While Mary Margaret fusses with the blanket on her cot, another inanimate object sings out, getting her attention. Under the bed, hidden in plain site *rolls eyes* is the key that opens her jail cell.

Isn't that convenient?!

Emma arrives with lunch and Mary Margaret quickly shuts the door, hiding the key in her hand. She tells her the DNA was a match for Katherine. And then to further explain, she tells us Katherine must be dead.

Ya' think?

Dear ABC,

Why hasn't anyone thought to question the gym teacher? He was the first one to find her car, and is her true love from fairytale land. No? *sigh* Never mind.

Emma tells Mary Margaret that she plans to expose the Mayor for planting evidence. Emma finally admits she has faith in Mary Margaret and asks for the same.

Easy for her to say, since she isn't the facing a death sentence or life in prison.

Emma finds Mr. Gold in the back of his shop and asks for his help to defeat the Mayor. He knows Emma feels desperate. He tells her she's more powerful then she knows—especially with that hair betting bigger each episode.

Rumpelstiltskin is investigating Prince Charming's cloak and removes a hair.

What is going to do with it? Hmm...I don't know. Maybe make a love potion so he can rule the world? Of course he is! Besides, that empty spot on the shelf would drive me crazy too.

What do you think Rumpelstiltskin is planning?


Anonymous said...

Your recap is more entertaining than the previews of the show let on. Fun stuff, BR.

BR Myers said...

Thank you, sir. I live to entertain!

Kimberlee Turley said...

LOL! I said the same thing to my husband about her hair too!

There was one episode where I thought Mary was finally growing her hair out, but not so.

Lydia Kang said...

I'd heard this was a good series, but you make it even more entertaining!

BR Myers said...

Thank you, Lydia!

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