Top Five Ways To Pretend You're At Book Expo America

Okay, first of all BEA should stand for Books, Editors and Agents. Everyone at BEA is either one of those things, or wants to be one of those things. Yes, some people want to be their favorite book *stares back* you know who you are.

Dude, where's the bathroom?
photo credit, publishingtrendsetter.com

And if you're like me, this week on twitter has been a total jealousy-fest. Seriously, it's free books, shmoozing, and Alex Pettyfer—sorry I was checking to see if you're still reading. Even without Alex BEA is pretty amazing...or at least I imagine.

I'm not one to dwell on the negative uglies that invade my otherwise content day to day philosophy, so I've developed some coping strategies to help me get through the rest of the week. And it's been so successful I'd like to share them with you. Here are the top five ways to pretend you're at BEA.

1. Use your drivers license to make your own lanyard with shoelaces and scotch tape. This must be worn ALL week, even in the shower.

2. Take a big tote bag to the library, fill it up with hardcovers, then invite all the librarians out for martinis.

3. Go to the biggest bookstore, make a fort with all the pretty new releases, and then take pictures with your iPhone.

Awesome!
photo credit, vi.sualize.us

4. With one of your favorite books under your arm, wait in line at the DMV, then ask the teller to sign Veronica Roth's name on the inside cover.

5. Stand all day in really cute but really uncomfortable shoes, discussing the pros and cons of e-books while complaining how dehydrated you are. (too many martinis)

And because I'm so bad at math, here's a bonus...

Repeat phrases like, "OMG, I met you on twitter!"  "I totally love your cover." "Can I borrow a pen?" "Her sweater set rocks!"

Do you have any other ideas for surviving BEA week as an outsider?

Top Five Methods To Help You Reach Your Word Count

You have an idea. Great!

You get the laptop ready. Great!

You write the first three sentences. And man oh man, they are awesome. Great!

Then you stare at the monitor for the next half hour trying to decide if that comma should be a semicolon.



Does this look familiar?
photo credit inboundpro.net



The phone book, not exactly as shown
photo credit bookguide.com

Come on!

The world is waiting for your super fantastic story. Hurry up!

I know...I know, easier said than done.

But don't despair, follow these tips and soon you'll be on your way to penning the next War and Peace.

                            
                            Top Five Methods To Help You Reach Your Word Count...

1. No Internet! You're reading this because you were on twitter, which means you're not writing. How's that working for you? If you need to do research, save it for later, it's too tempting to pop over and see what's new on Pinterest. Seriously, get off line.

2. Set a reasonable word count for each writing session. You want to set yourself up for success, not failure. The feeling of accomplishment will fuel your motivation for the next goal. Start small then gradually increase the word count.

3. Reward yourself each time you reach a goal. Preferably something that will get you moving or at least outside. Like say...a walk to the candy store. And if you don't live near a candy store, that's really sad.

4. Tell someone about your goal. Accountability increases your chances of following through. Lots of writers use twitter to give word count updates on their latest WIP. This helps motivate other authors as well.

5. Get unplugged. If you know your laptop only has a battery life of one hour, you'll write faster. No really, you will.

Now go set the world on fire with your awesomeness. I can't wait to read your book!

By the way, this blog was over 250 words. See how easy that was. Now it's time to reward myself with some left over Easter chocolate.

Cheers!