A comfortable pair of underwear is a cherished item, my friends. It can be the difference between having a great day or a lousy one filled with exploding pens, broken heels, paper cuts and sideways rain that renders your umbrella useless as you run for the bus.
I think you know where I'm going with this, I LOVE comfy underthings.
tujwellmess.com
lululemon, Halifax, NS
Imagine my excitement when my favorite brand of lululemon unmentionables went on sale!!!
The yoga gear clad girl at the cash asked if I wanted a bag for my purchase. I laughed. It would be like the using a full sized grocery bag for one egg.
I said, no thanks, then gathered my backpack and continued on my way to work. A few hours later, I dug out my lunch and I realized my new pair of underwear weren't in my backpack.
Ugh. I had forgotten them on the counter.
I phoned the store, hating how I'd have to explain how stupid I was. But the voice that answered wasn't a pert melodic female. It was a dude. And he sounded hot.
Double ugh.
I'm way too old to be blushing over the phone because of a boy, but when I had to ask him to look for my forgotten underwear, my ears were on fiyah
He was polite and asked for my name. Then he said I could pick them up anytime. After my ears cooled down, I wondered if he was hoping I was some long legged beauty of toned calves and taught abs. I considered sending my niece in my place. She's built like Jessica Rabbit. And if they hit if off, it would be a great story to tell their kids.
Instead, I waited for the next day. It was only underwear, I reasoned, and the dude probably forgot all about it. I strolled up to the cash, relieved to see three smiling girls all in a row. I dropped my voice and asked for my package.
The girl's eyes grew wide. She had no idea what I was talking about. "A forgotten purchase?" she was stunned. Apparently, no one has ever done that in her whole young life.
And that's when I heard his voice, "Is this about the underwear?"
I turned and we faced each other. I took in his stylish, two day stubble. He took in my grey roots. I knew in that fraction of a second as I watched his smile fade, I should have sent in my niece.
tvguide.com The chiseled and disappointed clerk (not exactly as shown, but pretty close).
Life is full of disappointments and chances not taken, I guess. It was a cruel lesson for him that day.
His fantasy was crushed, but at least I had my favorite underwear...and a title for this post.
Or better title, "Fakers, Fighters, and Frickin' Darkness"
Mr. Gold stands in front of a campfire in a jungle clearing. He pulls out The Dark One's dagger and uses it to summon a mysterious shadow beast/demon thing. At his request, the creature takes the dagger and hides it where even he won't be able to find it.
Emma and the gang continue to make a path through the jungle with Captain Sexy Eyes (CSE) as their guide. They have to be careful in the perpetual darkness because there is a plant with thorns that has a deadly magic that can kill—even the Dark One.
Hmm...that was interesting.
The reach the top of the cliff, but CSE is unable to see Peter Pan's hideout. Well, that would make sense since it's so FRICKIN' dark. They have to go around the aptly name Dark Jungle. They make camp, hoping to rest up before the next big fight.
In the Enchanted Forest (not to be confused with the Fantastical Field or Cursed Chasm) the magic mirror reveals to the Evil Queen that Prince Charming has just woken Snow White with true love's kiss.
Battle on!
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Snow White starts recruiting villagers for her army. The Evil Queen arrives with a deadly ultimatum; she wants Snow White to give up her claim to the throne or else a random peasant girl will die.
*Enter random peasant girl*
The Evil Queen promises to kill one of the peasants each day until Snow White steps down.
This so lame. Haven't we been through all this before? Zzzz
Emma wakes in the jungle to crying voices. She grabs her sword and decides to investigate. She finds Peter Pan, who gloatingly tells her he's looking forward to battling her for Henry. He then hands her a magical parchment that will lead her to Henry—(and the big battle I'm guessing). But the map is blank. Emma will only be able to find Henry when she finally accepts her true identity...the savior.
Emma takes her wand and says, “I solemnly swear to be up to no good.” Sorry, just kidding.
*Ten points for Harry Potter reference*
Instead, Emma and the others bicker about what to do next. Regina wants to use her magic on the map, but Emma won't let her. Mary Margaret uselessly encourages her with, "Don't give up."
Snow White and Prince Charming have a meeting with the dwarfs. She considers taking the Evil Queen's offer so the fighting can stop and they can all live peacefully. Charming says that's crazy ridiculous, the Kingdom is hers for God's sake! Charming goes to Rumpelstiltskin because obviously only magic can fix this whole mess.
Mr. Gold is playing with his corn husk doll, which is kind of sill considering he's the Dark One and everything. A cloaked figure jumps out and grabs the doll. He chases them down and unmasks the thief...it's Belle.
How did she get there?
She leans in for a kiss, then Mr. Gold realizes Belle is only a vision.
Anyway, back to glittery Rumpelstiltskin and Prince Charming. "Magic can't make someone believe," he giggles. "Belief must come from within." But Charming won't take no for an answer.
He's learned that you just keep asking for the same thing and it will be given to you. It's called 'toddler tactic'.
A-ha! There is a magical weapon that will help Snow White defeat the Evil Queen, by showing her who she really is.
Emma tries talking to the map. She says stuff like, "I'm Henry's Mother. My name is Emma Swan." Nothing is working. Then she tries, "I was sent through a portal to break a curse...I'm the savior." Regina gets impatient and snatches the map away. She performs the locator spell. They watch as the floating paper goes into the Dark Jungle.
Watch out for the deadly thorns!
Belle's fake hologram or whatever she is, takes Mr. Gold on a stroll through the jungle. He confesses he's a coward just like his father, and is useless to save Henry. Belle asks about the corn husk doll. It was the last thing his father gave to him. Belle tells him he has to let go of the past.
Funny, I don't remember seeing that at the shop.
In a truly metaphoric moment, he throws the doll away.
Prince Charming and Snow White journey to the top of a hill for the weapon, Excalibur. Prince Charming tries, but it won't budge. Only the kingdom's true ruler can wield...well you know the rest. Snow White effortlessly pulls the sword from the stone.
The map leads Emma and the gang to an even darker part of the jungle. Peter Pan and his Mad Max orphans surround them. A fight ensues with swords, magic fireballs and arrows. David gets a scratch. Emma tackles a kid, but she suddenly stops herself from beating him up.
Why?Maybe because he's a kid?
Anyway, Peter Pan calls off his hounds and they quickly disappear into the jungle.
The Evil Queen arrives at the village prepared to start killing random peasants, but Snow White is ready with Excalibur and runs at her like Last of the Mohicans. “This is my kingdom and I will fight for it.” She yells.
Go girl!
Mary Margaret asks Emma why she stopped fighting one of the Lost Boys. Emma confesses she saw herself in his expression; desperate, unloved, someone who cried every night wondering why her parents gave her up. In other words, a lost girl in the foster system.
She's the LOST GIRL. Where is Pinocchio? He still needs to be beaten up for leaving her in that orphanage.
She doesn't feel like a hero or a savior, the island makes her feel like...an orphan. Ta-da! The map reveals itself.
Snow White travels to see Rumpelstiltskin and offers to pay whatever Prince Charming promised for Excalibur. He does his little giggle and dance show and makes the sword disintegrate.
It was a fake! Prince Charming faked her out so she would have the confidence needed to fulfill. What a faker!
Just like when Harry pretended to give Ron Felix Felicis before the Quidditch match!
*Ten points for Harry Potter reference*
Snow White is super mad, but Prince Charming defends his actions, saying he only needed to remind her of how awesome she is.
I love it when the writers hit us over the head with the theme. Yeah, thanks we get it, they had to believe in their true selves.
CSE reads Emma's orphan map and they decide to make a sneaky plan of attack worthy of Scooby Doo.
Meanwhile Mr. Gold treks through the jungle alone. Out of the night sky, the corn husk doll falls in front of him. He sets it on fire, determined to leave his past behind. Then another doll appears, but this one he keeps.
Huh?
Peter Pan pays Emma a visit and boldly states she hasn't given forgiven her parents for abandoning her. And by the time she finally finds Henry, he'll feel the same way about her. Then he promises to make her an orphan again.
Yikes.
David waits until Mary Margaret is asleep. He lifts up his shirt to reveal his sword wound has gone from a thin scratch to a creepy gross magical infection.
Hey, too bad David's true identity isn't a healer.
Thanks to everyone who commented on facebook, twitter, here, and of course on wattpad. I'm pleased to present the new face of NIGHT SHIFT. You can read it FREE here!
Thanks to Aleksandra Dali, a fantastically supportive reader on wattpad for designing this eye catching cover. Check out her stories here.
NIGHT SHIFT will be a featured story on wattpad starting October 4! You can read it for FREE here. The bursting excitement has me all giddy and bubbly headed. Yes, I just made up the phrase 'bubbly headed.'
Here's my conundrum though, I have ten awesome cover designs by wattpad readers, but I'm not sure which one to use. And this is where YOU enter stage right and cast your vote, thereby using your power to help one cover rise above the rest—one cover will rule them all.
Let me know which one would make you stop, reach out and snatch it off the shelf—or in this case, click the mouse and start to read.
If you need some inspiration check out the book trailer below or the Pinterest Board.
Now scroll down to experience all the lovely. I'm amazed at all the different images for the same story.
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All right, now comes the big responsible part. Just leave your vote in the comment section. And thanks for playing.
Or better title, "Blood Magic; The Most Convenient Magic of all"
entertainmentoutlook.com
The show starts with Emma giving birth to Henry while the security guard from the prison looks on. She refuses to hold the baby, and tearfully says she's not fit to be his Mother.
We flash forward to present day as Hook, aka Captain Sexy Eyes (CSE), steers the gang toward Neverland.
Henry lands on a darkened beach with Naomi and Greg. They break it to Henry that they're not in the Enchanted Forest, but in Neverland “The Mother-load of Magic,” according to Naomi.
CSE points out to Regina how ironic it is that he's wasted most his life trying to leave Neverland to find Rumpelstiltskin, and now he's got him on board.
Emma is bitter towards Mary Margaret and David. She says choosing to be good has never worked out for them. She decides being hopeful sucks and that her parents are useless.
Mr. Gold breaks up the meeting and determines he's the one that can save Henry. He calls Emma out, saying she's still a non-believer.
He says, 'Neverland is a place where imagination runs wild, and unfortunately yours doesn't.' Then he disappears!
Greg and Naomi make a camp fire, hoping to connect with their evil counterparts. Out of the woods, the Lost Boys arrive and drop the bomb shell that they tricked Greg and Naomi. Their only mission is to collect Henry.
While a freaky shadow thing rips out Greg's soul and Naomi is skewered, Henry takes off into the jungle. He's rescued by a young kid with big ears.
Back on the ship, Emma does chin ups in anticipation of some kick ass action to come. CSE gives her Baelfire's old sword. They throw back a few shooters, drinking to Neil.
In the Enchanted Forest, Neil wakes up surrounded by Mulan, Aurora and Prince Phillip.
So... I guess they found Phillip.
Aurora excitedly tells Neil that she knows Henry since they spent some time in the sleepy room of flames together. She's convinced she can contact him again with a message that Neil is alive and that he loves Emma.
The pirate ship comes under attack.
What is it? A whale? A krachan?
Nope. Angry mermaids. There's a lot of canons fired, then Regina gets bored and tosses a couple fire balls into the water. Emma manages to catch one and they bring it aboard.
FYI, mermaids in Neverland wear a lot of eye make-up and bejeweled bikini tops.
Henry and the mysterious boy with big ears take a rest. He shows Henry a vial of pixie dust, but claims it's useless. Then they talk about how creepy Pan is...you know about the stealing boys out of their beds issue.
Dear ABC,
J.M. Barrie is rolling in his grave.
Neil and Mulan converse about his bizarre childhood and upbringing. Aurora wakes from her sleep and determines she cannot make contact.
I'm shocked that she's useless...just like every other episode.
Neil puts on a sad face. Then he remembers his dad was so magical, he must have left something behind in his castle. Maybe that could help them?
Off to Rumpelstiltskin's castle!
Speaking of...Mr. Gold finds Naomi pulling herself along the ground with an arrow sticking out of her back. I know he's still Mr. Gold and NOT Rumpelstiltskin because his hair is straight and there's not a speck of gold glitter.
He magically heals Naomi and asks her about Henry. She tells him Henry took off into the woods. She apologizes profusely and asks for his forgiveness. Instead, he rips out her heart and crushes it like a bag of potato chips.
Mulan and Neil travel to Rumpelstiltskin's castle. He confesses his fear of not having Emma love him back prevented him from telling her he loved her.
What? *scratches head*
The mermaid blows her conch shell and creates a storm. The others argue how to interrogate her; Mary Margaret wants to strike a deal, while Regina wants to kill her. Instead, Regina turns the mermaid into a statue. Suddenly a huge wave engulfs the entire ship.
Dummy. Everyone knows you never, NEVER turn a mermaid into stone.
In Rumpelstiltskin's castle Neil and Mulan search for some kind of magical solution to their problem.
Wait, that's every episode.
Robin Hood shows up and threatens them with his arrows, claiming that the castle is now his.
Does anyone see that this Robin Hood is completely different looking than the Robin Hood from last season?
Neil says he doesn't want the castle, only that one magical thing. Robin Hood tells Neil that Rumpelstiltskin actually spared his life.
Soon magical music starts...Neil finds his father's walking stick and a mysterious cabinet is revealed. Neil recognizes the blood magic.
Oh, okay. Blood magic. That's convenient.
Regina and Mary Margaret manage to have a fist fight on the ship. CSE and David decide to join them. Meanwhile, Emma tries to steer them through the storm. Since no one is listening to her, she dives overboard.
That, Emma. It's always about her desperate need for attention.
Henry and the kid with big ears are cornered by the Lost Boys. Henry grabs the vial of pixie dust and gives a lovely speech about how you have to believe in order for it to truly work. He takes the kid's hand and they jump off the cliff...and what do you know, they can fly. They can fly. They can fllllyyyy.
David ties a rope around his waist. He jumps in the angry waters after Emma and brings her to the surface. With the others helping, she's brought on board. She spits up some water and suddenly the storm stops.
Oh my gosh. It's like they had to work together to stop the storm...just like magic.
Mr. Gold finds the head Lost Boy, and says he's in Neverland for Henry. The Lost Boy gloats, promising a battle that will end Mr. Gold's life. Then he slaps down a present from Pan, a crude doll made from corn husks. Mr. Gold starts to cry.
Neil searches the hidden cabinet. He finds a snow globe and concentrates on how much he loves Emma. There is a vision and Neil sees that Emma is in Neverland.
She and the others have made it to the dark beach—except the mermaid, I don't know what happened to her.
Emma reminds them all that this island is build on belief, and now is the time for them to all believe...not in magic (even blood magic), but to believe in each other.
I think Sesame Street called that cooperation.
Henry and the kid make it to safe ground. Then the boy reveals that he's Peter Pan. He's been on a mission to find the heart of the truest believer. And now Henry and his heart belong to Pan.
And now it's time for a musical request. This one goes out to Henry from Storybroke, the truest believer and youngest member of the most dysfunctional family.
I admit, I was a bit sore with the writers/producers/directors/key grip guy/make-up artists/coffee gofer and basically anyone else who had anything to do with the last episode of Season 2, "Straight On Until Midnight."
However, after a long summer of the Bachelorette Season 9, I'm ready to return to Storybrooke. And most importantly, Hook or Captain Sexy Eyes as I like to refer to him...(CSE) for short.
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The first episode of the third season will be two hours and I'm guessing there will be plenty of back flash footage we've already seen—which is perfectly acceptable if it involves seeing this dude again. The Sheriff of my dreams. *sigh*
storybrooktvguide.com
Okay, here's a sneak peek at all the evil fun and inconsistent magical times we're about to be dumped into.
#1. The hot new guy in your chemistry class ignores your brilliant charisma and instead zeroes in on the shy girl with mousy brown hair who never wears make up and has no personality.
#2. Everyone's parents are either working late, running out the door to work, or too tired from work to notice that the new neighbor may or may not be a werewolf.
#3. Your best friend has been the same guy since grade one, even though no one ever stays best friends that long. Plus, you've secretly developed a crush on him.
#4. The most gorgeous girl in school is also the meanest.
#5. Your best friend from #3 starts to date the girl from #4. You're upset, but not enough to tell him the truth because that would make NO SENSE AT ALL. Instead, you plan an elaborate ruse to win him over that blows up in your face the night of the big dance.
xfinity.comcast.net
#6. Yourother best friend is a fashion diva and likes 80's music.
#7. When a dark and mysterious dude moves to town you start developing super powers.
#8. The brooding delinquent is misunderstood by everyone...except you.
#9. All it takes to make you over into a super model is a pair of contacts and a hair straightener.
BONUS!!!! Every cute guy has amazing abs and green eyes, however statistically suspicious it may be.
